Resolutions

It’s the first day of a brand new year.

It’s at the same time momentous and ordinary.  Every 365 (or if you really want to get technical 365.25, you know because of the leap year) days we start a whole new cycle.  Resolutions are made and kept and broken and every year we celebrate.

My sister’s birthday is today.  So at the stroke of midnight on December 31st we not only wish each other a happy new year but also wish her a happy birthday.

I’ve made a few resolutions. I usually do. But for some reason I don’t want to say them out loud.  I feel like I’m going to jinx it somehow.  Like wishes, if I say them out loud they won’t come true.

And I do very much believe in wishes.

So, I’ll keep them to myself and pray that this year I follow through with them.  I hope that this year will be better than the last, because we should always aspire to greater things than what came before.

2012, you weren’t bad, you weren’t great, you were just another year lived.  I learned new things, I grew, I changed, I loved, I laughed, I cried, I lived and that’s the least that I could’ve asked for.

I wish you all the very best in this new year.  I wish you luck in all that you do and I wish you happiness and joy.

Happy New Year all!  Let’s be good to each other this year okay?

meet the blogger

• Name: Jenny
  
• Height:  5’6.5”
• Eye Color: dark brown
• Birthday: April 24
  
• Favourite color: blue and red
  
• Best school subject(s): English
• Mac or PC:  PC
• Current shirt color: white
• Gamer?: bahahahahahahaha! hell no.
  
• Day or night: mornings
• Celebrity crush: so many… Lee Pace, Chris Evans and Tom Hiddleston
  
• Coffee?: put it in my veins!
• Favourite Food:  pizza

String Theory

Please don’t hate me.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I don’t say the right things half the time. And sometimes I’m awkward and I stutter and I laugh at my own jokes.

I’m sorry that I’m irrational and petty and neurotic as hell and I’m all the worst things you could possibly be.

I just don’t know how to be a normal person.

You know that moment where everything makes sense?  That moment when  things just seem to be falling into place?  and while not everything is perfect, you understand that it doesn’t need to be in order for you to be happy? You know, that moment when you’ve realized you’re no longer lost but found and the road is clear before you? It’s like everything in the universe is spinning and working together the way it should be.

I haven’t had that moment. I’m still wandering, searching and hoping that maybe sometime soon I can be a grown up too and have my life in order and stop being angry and sad and feeling stupid all the time because I don’t know how to deal with things properly.

Instead I throw temper tantrums like a child and shout and say mean things that I regret later on. Or I waste my time day dreaming and wishing on stars like that’s actually going to accomplish something.

Because I’m scared that everything is going to go wrong and that people will realize that I don’t know what I’m doing.

So bear with me as I go through my desert. Hopefully I find my way soon.

But until then please don’t leave me.